Monthly Archives: April 2011

Teen Dating

Never fails, within the youth/student ministry ministry there will be a discussion about relationships, purity, etc etc etc.  Now if I wanted to stand on my soap box, I would talk your ear off on how we need to be spending more time talking about the best relationship of all, with our Savior Jesus Christ…but that shall be for another time.  Let me stay on topic.

Now I could go a thousand ways with this topic, but I just simply want to focus on one question for young people.  It is for when the next time a young person asks “How should I pick my companion in life?”  Okay, so students don’t talk like that…it will probably asked more like…”Should I date her?” “Is he right for me” “Are there any Christian girls out there”…if you are in student ministry, you probably heard this and more, but what should your answer be?  If it was up to me, I would rather no one date while they are still in student ministry, it sure would make things easier.  But since that is more fantasyland…let’s discuss.

First and foremost, you need to start with Scripture.  I realize you wouldn’t go to People Magazine or Seventeen Magazine, but it still is worth stating.  Here are the 3 lessons we get from Scripture.  Number one – must be a believer.  Number two – must exhibit the fruits of the Spirit, or in other words live like a Christian.  Number three – Proverbs 31 is the kind of girl you want, and the kind of guy you want…wouldn’t be a bad idea to check out 1 Tim. 3:1-13 and Tit. 1:5-9.

Remember these words, TAKE THEM TO SCRIPTURE.  For example, instead of checking out girls/guys at the mall, check out Hebrews 11…look for these types of people.  This world we live in…it is going to tell you to look for the best looking, the one that is on the highest paying career track, or the most popular…the list goes on.  God paints a different picture.

The world looks for supermodels, Christians should look for super-devoted.  The world looks for dollar signs, Christians should look for selfless givers.  The world looks for healthy and fit, Christians should look for growing and loving.

You starting to see the difference.  Students are always going to complain/question/joke/be confused/want to talk about relationships.  What are you going to tell them?

I know what I would tell them.  You want someone that will take you further in your relationship with Christ, someone that challenges you in your faith instead of your purity line, someone that makes you love Jesus more each moment you spend with them, someone that will love you when you have the flu and are hanging your head in the oval office as much as they love you when you are all dressed up, someone that cares more about how much you are growing spiritually than how much your bank account is growing, and someone that when the tough times come they find a way to make you smile, find a way to pray away your fears, find a way to wipe away the tears, and find a way to the cross.

That is what I would tell them.  What about you?